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Living with Roommates

Congratulations on becoming a part of Baylor University and Campus Living & Learning! The relationships you develop and the experiences you will have while living on campus will truly change your life. One of the most important factors will be the relationship you develop with your roommate(s). We believe that as you get to know your roommate(s), you will also be getting to know yourself in a whole new way.

Great roommate relationships do not come by chance or luck. Now, this doesn't mean that if you went "potluck", you are doomed! In fact, even if your roommate is your life-long friend, you may still have roommate problems. Experience tells us that oftentimes students who choose their own roommate struggle more than those who go potluck. The bottom line is this: Good roommate relationships take work and patience. It takes good communication, maturity, give and take, and time. The following information was prepared to help you and your roommate get started in the right direction.

Just how are roommates assigned?
Students are assigned in the order their housing applications are received. Mutual roommate preferences are considered first and assigned to preferenced halls based on availability. For those students who do not list a roommate preference(s) (or requests were invalid), their hall assignments are made based on space availability. Another item to consider is that often the habits you had in high school are not necessarily what you will carry over to college life. For example, you may have regularly gone to bed early and gotten up early, but now, without Mom or Dad around, your internal clock has shifted to going to sleep late and waking up late! We also know that parents often fill out applications for students and have a different perception of your personal preferences!

Something else to remember is that you're not the first person to share a 12' x 15' room with a complete stranger. So, how does one make it work and really make it college-"transforming" like we talked about in the first paragraph? Here are more helpful suggestions.

First: COMMUNICATION
It starts here: In your housing assignment letter, you received the email address of your roommate(s). Email him or her (or them) to introduce yourself briefly and schedule a time to talk with each other on the phone. Details regarding who will bring what can wait until a later time. Use this first conversation as a way to begin getting to know each other, while also setting a positive tone for your new relationship.

It is natural to feel a little apprehensive about that first communication. We have found that it's best to be upbeat and positive, and not to divulge all your quirks or expectations at once! Expect some differences; you'll both have experiences and opinions. Just because it's different than yours doesn't mean it's bad or wrong. One of the best aspects of living with others is learning to appreciate the unique qualities of each individual.

Remember that just as you will change in many ways while at college, so too will your roommate(s), so don't hold onto your first impressions too strongly. These impressions can drastically change as you get to know your roommate(s) during the first weeks of the semester. It is important to give each other time to get to know each other better.

What should we talk about?
The following are some questions/topics to help you begin your first conversation:

Where are you from? Where have you lived?
How old are you?
Who's in your family?
Why did you want to attend Baylor?
What are you planning on studying at Baylor?
What are you most excited about in coming to Baylor?
What are some of your interests/hobbies? What do you like to do for fun?
What do you like to read, watch or listen to?
What anxieties to you have about coming to Baylor?
What makes you unique?

As you come to live at Baylor, you will quickly learn that communication with your roommate is essential for having a good overall living experience. Take the initiative now and set the stage for a great relationship!

What to talk about in later communications:
After you have a bit more knowledge of each other, start communicating about some practical items such as:

Decorating - some people want to have coordinated bedding; some already have their own. Ask carefully so you do not set up "expectations".
Will you be using the following in your room? And if so, who will bring these items?

Telephone and answering machine
TV/DVD/VCR/Stereo
Refrigerator- should we rent?
Cable TV- should we get it?
Carpet- should we get it?

Living in Community:
What does it mean to live in community? Does it simply mean living in a building with numerous other Baylor students? In Campus Living & Learning we view community as far more than a group of people in close proximity. Rather, we believe living in community is the integral and potentially life-changing element of your overall Baylor experience. Community is about sharing life and holding one another accountable; to know and be known by others; and the chance to play a significant role in something larger than you. It can be tempting to view life as a story about me where you are the central character and all others are simply actors in your life movie. Much of life today seems to support this claim that life is about you and what you want it to be. However, as you learn to live together in community you will realize that you are a part of something far greater. The experience of living in community at Baylor promises to be exciting and enjoyable, but it will also challenge you to take greater responsibility for your role in the overall community.

Our challenge for you today is to begin thinking about what it means to be a part of something bigger than yourself. How will your actions affect those around you? What are your rights as a member of the community? And just as importantly, what is your responsibility as a part of the larger community? As you begin to be challenged by these questions you will realize that living in community at Baylor is certainly much more than simply living in the same building as a large group of other individuals.

Strengths

Explore how your strengths might impact living with your roommate.

Seize the opportunity you have been offered. Come to Baylor ready to be transformed!